I was ambushed by Bikram yoga. I had never heard of it in my life before my friend Charmie invited me to a class. I had run into her at a community pool where our kids were swimming together on a school holiday. Some of those heavily evangelistic churches should hire Charmie as a consultant. She’s very persuasive. After talking with Charmie about Bikram yoga, I knew the following facts:

1. Bikram yoga was healing Charmie’s knees, which had been trashed by years of ballet.

2. Bikram yoga is one of the few forms of exercise that is safe and beneficial to do every day.

3. Bikram yoga is done in a room heated to 105 degrees.

4. I should be at the studio at 10 AM Monday morning. I should drink a lot of water before class and bring a towel and a water bottle.

So, in other words, I attended my first class in a state of near-platonic naivete. I wish everyone could do the same. Most people who come to Bikram yoga have a load of preconceptions and expectations that are almost as burdensome as the toxins they’ll be sweating out of their bodies.

Oh, did I just say “toxins?” Yeah, so there I was at my first Bikram yoga class. I had shown up at 10 AM Monday morning, and I told them Charmie invited me. Charmie herself was nowhere to be seen. I wondered what I had got myself into, but it was too late to chicken out!

Once I got in the room and started doing the yoga, the instructor had a lot to say about toxins, and breathing. I heard her say that I would be releasing toxins from my body through my sweat. The instructor described how the poses were massaging my internal organs and what benefits each would have for my health. I’d never heard anything like it! Why would I want to massage my transverse colon?

“You’ll have a big ‘detox’ after class,” the teacher warned. “It’s normal.”

What’s a “big detox?” Well, here’s a clue. It happens in the bathroom, and you’re generally in a big hurry to get there once you realize the “detox” is in progress.

The truth is that I didn’t believe the words I heard at the time. In fact, I didn’t even understand them. I came to both believe and understand in time, but at my very first class, I was learning with my body and with my heart.

I could write an explanation like “Bikram yoga is 26 postures and two breathing exercises carried out in a room heated to 105 degrees blah blah blah…” but no one can really tell you what the yoga is. You have to experience it for yourself. Once your spine and your hips and your knees understand the yoga, your brain will begin to get it. All you need to know is what Charmie told me. Drink water. Bring a towel.

Namaste.